Watch out!

I'll be posting a series of revelations.. so here we go!
In chronological order:
By 22 Apr:
I was hit by a strong bout of doubts, I questioned about my existence and even began to think of God as narcissistic..
Immediately after, I felt guilty and sent an email of remorse to my friend. I then told myself, maybe I'll take it slow, maybe I'll just be a quiet Christian.. (watch out for what God says about this)
I prayed to God for forgiveness that night, and God was merciful. Instead of rebuking me, He encouraged me: "What counts is not wearing yourself out with good deeds but turning yourself toward Him and loving Him with your whole heart. Be careful not to take the friendship for granted. He isn't like your friends in school, just as imperfect as you are. He is God. While you are learning to love Him as your best friend, don't ever lose sight of how awesome He is and of all the incredible gifts He gives you. Start to think of yourself as a friend of Jesus"

I thank God for His comforting words.

On 24 Apr:
During Sunday service, the sermon that day was on setting my affections upon Him. Pastor Derek said Love is a decision. A commitment; even if it means inconveniencing myself. He gave the example of him playing with his son even when he is tired because he loves him. After the preaching, Pastor said he wanted to pray for those who were weary and feeling spiritually dry. I felt that God is encouraging me. I must not lose my calling! Bible study that day says: we are created to serve.
Whew!

On 29 Apr:
Before I headed to cell group, I was feeling frustrated that my best friend might not have trust in me. Then I started thinking about what other people thought of me, if I were a trustworthy person. It irked me a lot till I came to the revelation that I do not live for the approval of man, but God.
Cell group that night was amazing. I literally felt the presence on God come upon me. During worship, Rachel shared her vision, God is with us through our ups and downs. He will never forsake us. Whether we are depressed or when we are happy, He is with us. I was reminded of
-my 1st experience with God..
-The time He comforted me when I was depressed,
-the answers He gave me when I had questions,
-the joy I felt, the lightness of being, my happiness,
I remember that He is INDEED with me be it in my happy or sad moments. Then Rachel shared, God says why have you forsaken me? I broke down and I told God You are my greatest love. I yield to You and all that I am I submit to You. I commit myself to You.
Towards the end of the cell group, sister Agnes said that we are not to be lukewarm Christians for "Lukewarm Christians will be spit out from the kingdom of God." (see that?!)

... TO BE CONTINUED